Enjoy ur baby ...... without being worried how to be a perfect mother

I really want to say this to all new moms .....RELAX,,,,,,


Enjoy ur newborn baby with ur partner and spend some time together; looking at ur little one and talking abt her
.Dont get in rush to do everything perfect and get tired. Following blindly every word by others (except your doctor) and getting frustrated.Trust yourself that u r a good mother and u wud try to do ur best for ur new born even if others don't agree with u.

Quite often I see in my neighbourhood, mother in laws take whole charge of baby and try to keep keep distance between the baby and mom.Bonding between mom and baby is sometimes discouraged by MIL only because of their over excitement of taking care of newborn.

They themselves believes that they are experienced and a young mother is ignorant so its solely  their responsibility  to take care. Even if they do this  with good intention,this some times give rise to other problems......like following old practices that cud create problems(too much wrapping baby or bathe or massage rigoursly,squeezing out baby milk,putting oil in ears and nose)
Also I  have noticed sometimes they discourage breastfeeding to baby or might put too much pressure for breast feeding ,making the young mothers so anxious or scared....or nervous that it affects her .....
 
listen to one of my cousins story...........she wasn't able to breastfeed her baby as everybody around her esp her mom put so much pressure by telling whats the right way to hold or how to sit the entire time u breastfeed or how to keep a finger on your breast so that ur baby wont suffocate or how to keep a hand. or squeeze ur breast to let the milk come out.eating only particular things and doing too much PARHEZ(abstinence frm certain foods)......so on so on........that it all made her so nervous, that she was hardly able to  breastfeed her baby.

While in my case ,I just fell in love with my baby at the first sight that I did what my heart said was good for my little wonder.I was never worried about milk production and improving the quality of milk by eating particular food, never absconded any food.Ate to my heart delight whatever I liked.Breastfeed my baby in lying down position during nights as it was relaxing for me(which was not allowed by olders).And guess I never had any single breast feeding problem till date,still BF at around one year without any worrying.
Don't take too seriously all that the neighbor says and all that older people says (as there information is passed on to them by their elders which is sometimes not correct).
I am not saying that they are wrong always and ignore them completely, its good to listen to their good advices but don't be afraid to trust your own common sense.bringing up your baby wont be complicated if u take it easy and trust your own instincts.

Everytime you pick your baby up---even if u do it little awkwardly at first ---and change her bathe her feed her smile at her,she's getting the feeling that she belongs to you and that u belong to her.
what mothers instinctively feel like doing for their babies is usually best after all .

Better to relax and make a few mistakes than to to try too hard to be perfect.

Post cont.........(part two trust yourself without worrying what other advices)

BUM CHUM Cloth Diapers Review

BUMCHUM Diaper is the one baby product I wished I had heard about it before my lo was born. I wud have bought many of them as they can be used for a long time. It was the first cloth diaper that I have ever seen and I quite liked it.

Click to read about other cloth diaper brands in India

WHAT IS BUMCHUM DIAPER ?

Its the new age diapering solution for all the modern moms in India.

Its a kind of cloth diaper that work as both the disposable one and reusable cloth diaper.

Can u belive it?

Because of its cost and difficulty in understanding its varities, functionality, material and usage via online sites,many of us stay away from buying it.I will try to explain about it in very laymen's language and its usefulness for many years of your babys life

There are three varieties ----bumchum fitted,bum chum cowboy and bumchum natural.....

Names are little confusing for first time buyers....... so I will explain one by one

1. BUMCHUM FITTED DIAPER

Actually, Its a pocket diaper.

"Now what the hell is pocket diaper."

Relax its not complicated,it has a pocket made in it ,which is used to stuff something(insert) inside it.

comes with a diaper cover and two inserts

Diaper cover's outer material is leak-proof and breathable



diaper cover with pocket

 Insert

inner material of diaper cover is highly absorbing that keeps the baby's skin dry for many hours.

 

Diaper cover has a pocket running from one side to another to put inserts in it.

It has snap on buttons to get a perfect fit for babies of all age(from 2 kg to 20 kg)

 

How many hrs does it works & how many inserts to put in it?
For a newborn,you have to change diaper after it is spoiled (by poop).as newborns poop every 2 to 14 times a day ,you have to change diaper as many times as diposable one or any cloth diaper.
for nine month old,you can change it after 3 or 4 hrs.but I have observed with my baby  using single insert only ,that it works for 5  hrs without any wetness in inner layer of diaper cover and babys skin ;and any leakage outside.
During day only one insert is enough for about 3 to 5 hrs(depending on weather ) and during night put two inserts for a long stretch of 8hrs.
I love bumchum pocket diapers a lot,with my experience ,can suggest u to buy without any doubt.


 2. BUMCHUM COWBOY DIAPER
These diapers consist of a diaper cover and a insert.
Its diaper cover is same as fitted one minus the pocket
 

 

 

 

its insert has snap on buttons in it that can be snapped on the diaper cover and tucked onto wide elastic band 
so here insert is not stuffed in any pocket.
inserts are bit large and made of highly absorbing material that keeps the baby's skin dry for almost 3 hrs.

 

 

How to use them ?
These diapers are easy to use .when the insert get soiled, just remove the insert wipe clean the diaper cover and snap on another insert .this way you will need only one diaper cover and six seven insert through out the day.they are good as day diapers but cannot be used for long duration during night without changing.

Why they are good?
You can save money by just buying few diaper cover(2 or 3) and more inserts.
good for newborns.as with newborn babies diaper needs to be changed many times.so its best to go with this one to save money on diapers.

I haven't used these diapers on my baby.read some good reviews about it from fellow mommy blogger who uses it more than pocket one .Also some bad reviews,some babies are heavy wetters ,so needs to be changed frequently than others.


3. BUMCHUM NATURAL DIAPER
They are made for babies with sensitive skin.
I have never personally used them on my baby but haven't read some good reviews on some online purchasing sites.complains were mostly about its not keeping baby's skin dry.

May be they are made for sensitive skin so lacking in absorbency.
well I haven't used them on my baby so I cant give my personal views on it.

 

Colours or prints available in BUMCHUM  diapers

• 

  Smart Alec looks like denim my fav one
• Busy bee black and yellow horizontal stripes
• Moo cow  interesting cow skins print 

 

Does it work during night?
ya,pocket diapers do, during night just add two inserts for extra protection,it works,for 6 to 8 hrs but yes there are incidents of leakage too after heavy wetting.
for newborn you have to change diaper at night too if it is spoiled by poop.

How many diapers will I have to buy for my baby ?
For a new born u might require as many diapers as the no. of times your baby poops.but then u might need 10 to 15 diapers a day.
but as baby grows up, u wont require a lot of them
For a nine month old u will need about 8 to 10 diapers a day if using bumchum only and doing ur laundry daily.

I have bought only six bumchum pocket diapers,I give my baby some nappy free time too(almost 2 hr twice while baby take naps).I have got normal blommers too and use disposables while travelling or days when I am very tired or ill to do laundry.

 Why shud I buy it? 

• Now u don't have to change your baby's diaper every half an hour like old cloth diapers (langots).
• But still you don't have to waste money in buying disposable one which contains absorbing chemicals
• Never run out of diaper.remember how many times u go out to just buy ur baby's diapers only.
• no leaks only goodness of cloth.

What is their cost?
One diaper cost around Rs 825 to Rs 1045 and can be bought on a good discount online.
Ya, they are costly but if u look at their usefulness for a long time, and compare with money consumed on disposable ones,u will find them much cheaper than disposables if u use it for ur newborn upto he is a toddler.

 

From where do we buy Bumchum Diapers? Are they available in local shops?
 

U can easily buy them online ,I got mine from FLIPKART.I got a good discount on bumchum pocket diaper .Delivery was in time and product was really good.
 
So keep on checking these sites time to time for discount.another site to look for is AMAZON, its giving good discount on other modern cloth diapers .I haven't seen bumchum diapers on local shops,so I can't say anything
on that.

MY favourite bumchum diaper
my favourite one is the pocket diaper ie, bumchum fitted in denim print(smart alec). my lil birdie look so cool in these denim look like diapers.i have four of them.really. they goes well with all type of tops and tshirts.


 

  I will  say that I love cloth diapers.once u will use cloth diapers,u wud fall in love with them

 

read about other cloth diapers here Cloth diaper brands in India

Buying things before Baby arrives

In our culture many people consider buying new things until they have their babies, could be unfortunate.
Before Namkaran ceremony ,people generaly used clothes of older children or cousins of relatives or neighbors
but time has changed and peoples too,pregnancies are easy and deliveries are much safer now

Buying and arranging things ahead of time lightens your burden later on, it becomes difficult for mothers to go out once baby arrives.

Only thing to consider is to just by the Basics in the begining and then look for other products according to your necessity in coming months
 
Do not buy all that good-looking and pretty unnecessary waste .but first time mothers usually ends up buying a lot of clutter forgetting the necessary items...........READ THE OTHER POST

    GET READY WITH THE BASICS that u will need from the start
 

• DIAPERS/NAPPIES.......both disposable, modern cloth diapers,old indian style nappies(langots)....a lot of them
• WIPES and big cotton rolls, some clean muslin clothes........use cotton and water whn baby has rashes
• diaper rash cream and Vaseline(any petroleum jelly)
• ear buds
• Swaddler or any soft cotton cloths for swaddling
• flannel cloth or shawl or wollen blanket during winters
• Sheets  changing mat or quick dry sheets..........don't use those plastic sheet whn good options are available now
• baby towels (atleast two)
• bottles atleast two even if u breastfead ur baby, though docs are against using bottle these days
• A thermoflask.....u will need warm water for mixing formula or may be during diaper change
• Baby beddings........... foam mattress or any firm mattress..........people usely make cotton mattress(gadda)in our country and....................    mattress cover, some people buy pillows and bolster too
• baby clothes...........................soft cotton cloths,socks,wollen or cloth cap(topi)
• mosquito net.......in our country its a must.
• toiletries......baby soap,shampoo,oil,lotion.....................etc etc
• Dettol
• sanitary pads with extra wings and longest size
• nursing gown that opens from front
• old used properly washed panties, that u can throw without wasting money......or disposable panties

   Things that u might need after a week

• more bottles and nipples if u r bottle feeding
• sterilizer or any electric kettle with automatic cut off..................if ur bottle feeding mostly,sterlising becomes a daily task
•  a digital thermometer(don't use mercury one) and nose syringe
•  pacifiers....atleast two
• A pram or stroller .........if u want to go out
• separate sleeping place for baby.......bassinet or crib,or cradle
• nursing bras and breast pads .........if ur breastfeeding
• a sling or front carrier.................if u live alone and have so many chores to do
• a bath tub or baby bather.......if u cant bath ur baby on ur legs(old indian style).........read how to bath ur newborn easily
• grooming set........brush,nail clippers,scissors etc.....

    some more things

• a car seat.....................if u have car ;)  or u cant carry ur baby on ur arms while in car
• changing table
• seats swings walker
• high chair not before 6 months
• a diaper bag................if u don't have any good bag in ur house or u travel a lot
• bibs.....................
• playpens,rockers,playgym..............if u have lot of money to spend for 2-3 months only
• normal bath tub whn ur baby start sitting on support
• toys,rattles etc.......obviously I don't need to tell abt it

this is my list but if u think I have forgotten some important products,,,,pls do remind and comment

 

why i bought crib and how i decided which one is best for me

Why I bought a crib or cotbed for my baby when every baby sleeps with parents in India?

I know very few people buy cribs in India,most people here have never even heard of it. Those who knows about it ,consider it as a western thing. In every house in my neighbourhood babies sleep with their parents in their beds. 
        
Initially my baby slept with us in our bed too .I was not afraid i would hurt her as like any parent from our country. But there are two very strong reasons that made me change my mind ,you must read-----

1. I didn't get enough space to sleep myself ,to roll and to stretch in bed.As a result I was not getting proper sleep,neither my husband nor my baby.

see what happens when parents sleep with babies (in how to be a dad.com),its really funny sometimes.

2.My baby fell from bed  I am ashamed to admit that one early morning my baby  got up when I was not there and fell from bed . This happens one more time in the morning while Iwas  busy doing my chores and was very sure that she is  asleep( had peeked into bedroom few minutes ago), but I had no idea whn did she got up and fell from  bed.
babies falling from bed is though very common but it could be really dangerous some times.

so finally for the safety of my baby and for my sake decided to get a place for my  baby to sleep. I searched at mothercare ,mom and me stores ,wudplay online store , on flipkart ,babyoye ,firstcry etc .....searched a lot online and then going to the stores at least three or four times


since  cribs were costly it was difficult to decide which was the right one considering its use, cost and multipurpose. Got really confused whether to buy or not.

How I made my final decision???
I considered all the points abt why I am buying it                  

• I wanted a separate place for my baby to sleep.
• My baby was already four months old ,so started rolling.
• I didn't want a cot that will be a waste later on.
• Someplace where she is safe when i am not around .Since I live alone with my husband (not in a joint family) ,baby's safety was a major issue during her playtime or nap during day when I am working in kitchen or elsewhere attending someone at the door.

              Considering my points I concluded to buy a cotbed that will convert to toddlers bed wouldbe good .

There are some really good options of cotbed in Mom And Me,Wudplay and Mothercare.

I liked wudplay products a lot all made of Teakwook.But I don't know whether they have their products displayed somewhere in delhi. so I didn't go for it.

I liked mothercare cribs a lot so finally zeroed my search on it.

I bought Mothercare Addington cotbed .
It's a really a beautiful piece in antique colour with fixed rails and three mattress position.
I put it next to my bed.My baby naps during day in it.I don't worry about her falling anymore.

It can convert to toddler bed and can be used upto 5 yrs.

 At night,i let my baby sleep next to me but whn she woke up at early morning I put her in crib so that I can start my morning without worrying.

Once she will stop night feeds,I will put her to sleep in crib only next to our bed,so that I can easly caress and pat her.

Cot/crib/cradles/bassinet/cotbed/cosleeper/moses basket.........a separate place for baby to sleep

Its very rare that we see a separate place for baby to sleep in our country. Babies sleep here,there,just anywhere with parents ,grandparents....everywhere in our houses.
Mostly,I have seen babies sleeping(napping)with grandparents during day when the mom is busy and sleep usually with parents at night in their bed. It not even considered unsafe here unlike west. I have slept with my baby too for first few months.but finally bought crib for my baby. I have my reasons.
read WHY I BOUGHT A CRIB FOR MY BABY?
Its good to have a separate place for baby to sleep and take naps .It gives you  and your baby space to sleep comfortably and have wonderful dreams .

you can use any one or two .............cot ,cradle,bassinet,cosleepers,moses basket or may be pram for baby sleep or nap time 
It depends on what u want, how much you want to spend on your comfort and how long u want it to be used. But don't buy too many things.

Sleeping place of my baby for first few month
When my baby was born I got an old pram (just like bassinet) from a cousin which was in good condition. I used it for naps during day.Since it has wheels I could take my baby anywhere I work. This way I can work and be with my baby all day. She used to love it too and spends most of her time in it. It was great to just rock her to sleep in it during day.I used to take her out for a walk in it too(as it was a pram)
Though bassinet is better than pram for sleeping.But pram can be used for both sleeping and taking baby out  .....


Bassinet /cradle cum bassinet/Bassinet on wheels/
A bassinet is simply a bed for baby for first four months that cocoon him.It may comes with wheels ,rocker or cradle too                                          

moses basket
To be really frank even I had never seen moses basket before in any house. But the first time I saw it on baby shop I found it so pretty and cosy .It snuggles baby like a cocoon.awwww.........

Cradle
I always wanted to buy a cradle but didn't. I regret ,it could have given me more sleep and comfort  to my back . Babies love to rock to sleep So whats better than a cradle. Babies love motion .Even a simple cloth cradle could do wonders at night by just rocking it while lying in your bed.Alas! I was not that fortunate.

Cradles are part of our culture.They could be made of wood,plastic,any metal ,silver gold......... or they can be made cheap too using clothes or may be baskets .

CRIBS,COTBED
I have already written so much about these in my oother posts.just  click the heading to read about them